Cancer Club

Saturday night I went to my first support group meeting. It is a group for young adults with cancer or for those who have had cancer. I wasn't really sure what to expect when I arrived and was a little surprised that there were only three of us there. The other two girls L and H were extremely nice and inviting. They made me feel comfortable right away. We talked about all kinds of issues and each of us told our story. They were wonderful listeners and also gave lots of helpful advice about what I could expect and tips to manage side effects and get through it. While I was so impressed by these girls I did feel somewhat out of place. When I was thinking about why this was I realized it was because I didn't feel at all sick. Both other girls have been through so much already and I guess I am just getting started. I am not in any pain nor do I feel that least bit tired. In fact the day before the meeting I went for a 5 k run with a friend and that day played 5 floor hockey games in a tournament. I have to keep reminding myself that I have cancer because I don't feel the least bit different. I listened to L and H talk and felt to bad for what they had gone through and were going through. I had trouble seeing the similarities in our situations or imagining myself going through the same. Is this because things have not sunk in? Or is it because my situation will be completely different? I am resisting the label of "sick person". I am starting finally look the part, at least in terms of my hair or lack thereof, and don't like that pretty soon people will be just able to look at me and know that I have cancer. I don't feel sick and therefore don't want others to think of me this way. Perhaps this is a little strange.